What should the traditional gift be?

First of all let us have a look at where the word anniversary originates from. As I did Latin at school I haven’t even had to look this one up; it is from the Latin anniversarius, which loosely translates from the words for year and to turn and means turning yearly. It is a day that commemorates and celebrates a past event that occurred on the same day of the year as the initial event. Following on from that statement Christmas is an anniversary of Christ’s birth, Birthdays are anniversaries of people’s births and Wedding anniversaries are celebrated on the same day of the year as the wedding occurred.

Giving presents on wedding anniversaries is usually something that just the couple do, although family and close friends may send cards and give gifts too. Major wedding anniversaries such as the Silver, Ruby and Gold may be the subject of often large parties and on those occasions most people invited will give presents and cards to the couple. There is a list of traditional gifts to be given on most anniversaries and even though many people will not give say diamonds to the couple on the 60th wedding anniversary, perhaps the man will do to his wife. My Mother asked my Father for something with diamonds for their 60th anniversary and he gave her a pack of playing cards, Boom boom.

In the UK and I believe the Commonwealth, a couple can receive a message from the monarch [queen] for their 60th, 65th, and 70th wedding anniversaries, and any wedding anniversary after that. If you live in the UK, that done by applying to Buckingham Palace.

I have listed below the latest version I can find of suggested or traditional gifts to give for the respective anniversaries. Some of these may supersede the original ones and there are variations in some national traditions. The list below is traditional to the UK and variations on this theme can be found in many countries, especially the USA.

First: paper, Second: cotton, Third: leather, Fourth: linen, Fifth: wood, Sixth: iron, Seventh: copper, Eighth: bronze, Ninth: pottery, Tenth: tin or aluminium,
Eleventh: steel, Twelfth: silk, Thirteenth: lace, Fourteenth: ivory, Fifteenth: crystal, Twentieth: china, Twenty-fifth: silver, Thirtieth: pearls, Thirty-fifth: coral or jade, Fortieth: rubies, Forty-fifth: sapphires, Fiftieth: gold, Fifty-fifth: emeralds and Sixtieth: diamonds. The gift for above 60 years of marriage many would suggest as being a medal.

Anyway, there is plenty to go at there and gifts can either be cheap or really expensive, depending on the couple, how much they want to spend and of course how much money they have. For example the eleventh wedding anniversary gift of steel could be anything from a nice pen to a motor car. The 4th one linen may lead to a bit of head scratching as it seems a bit old fashioned, as perhaps do other years such as bronze, copper and cotton. However, I am sure the ladies will be delighted with anything as at least it shows that her husband has not forgotten their anniversary and as the old saying goes, “Hell hath no wrath than a woman who has not received an anniversary card.’ Well it is something like that.